I’m not exactly a snob when it comes to celebrity beauty gimmicks. Midway through the great drugstore lip stain buy-up of 2014, I spotted some tempting tubes of color bearing the name of one Fergie. I guess I haven’t thought about her since “Glamorous”, a highly relatable anthem I pondered putting on my Nero playlist.
Not sure what else the Black Eyed Peas frontwoman’s been up to lately– are the Peas even still a thing? But she has evidently been working with everyone’s favorite purveyor of cheap beauty thrills to furnish Walgreen’s-goers with lip stain at soft drink prices.
I actually took these photos 5ever ago– just got distracted by the arrival of my long-anticipated shipment of Wicked Lippies. But without further ado, I give you Wet ‘n’ Wild Fergie Vicious Varnish High Shine Lip Stain– a lot of alliteration for… not a lot of dollars. #Glamorous
Availability: $2.61 from Walgreen’s,
Quantity: 0.17 fl oz
It’s Thursday. That means I don’t want to do anything except watch all of the Shonda Rhimes shows while cross-stitching a Latin motto in Baskerville onto some “antique white” Aida cloth. In a second I’m going to do just that. I mean, I’ve finished my work for tomorrow, cooked myself a food item, and even banged out a really terrible abstract for a conference paper– that last one’s only a triumph because it’s not due till December. If anyone knows how to write an abstract for a paper that doesn’t exist yet, plz help. Auxiliary Beauty? Sylirael? Imagine me swaying you with a compelling, puppyish sad face.
Anyway, I’m interrupting a brief stream of drugstore lip stain reviews to bring you a high-end option. By Terry’s Tint to Lip Water Color Lipstain promises a “tattoo hold” for a “tinted pout that won’t feel weighed down”, at least according to its Beauty.com page. The bit of virtual real estate it occupies on Space NK, on the other hand, emphasizes its sheerness– and inclusion of “anti-oxidant Cherry water and plumping Acerola active ingredients”, whatever that means. I’m not a chemist– I just may be mistaken for one based on racial stereotypes. I chose the shade called Beach Game, even though I feel at best kinda “meh” towards beaches in real life– sand, sun, scantily clad strangers, etc. It’s a luminous orange enlivened by gold shimmer, but its sheerness makes it (almost disappointingly) wearable.
Availability: $36 from Beauty.com or Space NK
Quantity: 0.23 fl oz
Mondays are rough. On this one, I overslept by an hour, missed a pedagogy meeting, and sat through four hours of teaching plus two hours of seminar without the benefit of solid food.
See, I’m taking this short course that only meets in November. A very famous 92-year-old Sinologist is in town for the month. While all my undergrads are citing him in their final papers, he’s trying to teach us some stuff about technical writing. It’s so full of esoteric details it’d probably make my skin erupt in hives if I tried to parse it on my own. Like, really– we read this thing about weights and measures, and I was so proud of myself for using eighth-grade math to figure out some stuff about the relative capacity of this vessel. (Squares inscribed in circles, isosceles right triangles!) And then I realized I misread the Chinese….
But whatever. This guy’s pretty cool– he’s got a bookcase necktie, and he let me illegally sip Soylent in a library seminar room while bumbling my way through some commentaries. And my drugstore lip stain survived the experience!
Availability: $6.49 from Milani.com, CVS, Drugstore.com, and Walgreen’s
Quantity: 0.09 oz
As a beauty buff who technically lives on a fixed income, I try not to be a brand snob. But really, brand snobbery’s pretty much the first thing that happened to me, as soon as I became financially independent. If I pay my own bills and file my own taxes, I get to buy myself the occasional Chanel lipstick! Or so I tell myself.
In reality, my Nyx-to-NARS ratio is respectably high. And I do buy a lot of indie! But I can’t deny that one of my favorite pastimes is the Sephora splurge. As a result, I’ve been neglecting the cozy and inviting world of drugstore makeup.
But no more! This weekend I celebrated the end of Daylight Savings by buying all of the lip stains from every pharmacy within a one-mile radius. It was sort of an impulse buy– that cut across three brick-and-mortar establishments. What can I say? Long-wearing lip color is very important to me.
I’m still working my way through that rather immoderate haul– expect a lot of reviews in the weeks to come! But so far, that stuff is pretty great. As far as lip stains go, I’d take every drugstore find I’ve tried over the hallowed Benetint (which I quite like as a cheek product). Here’s one of the standout performers!
Availability: $7.84 from Walmart, $7.89 from Drugstore.com, $8.99 from ULTA, CVS, or Walgreen’s
Quantity: 2.5 g